Happy Birthday, Chuck Norris
All of us at VintageGent’s Menswear Daily wish Mr. Texas Ranger the happiest of birthdays. Mr. Chuck Norris is 70 years old today, March 10th. However, his biceps are 55 years old and his Foot of Fury is 70 years and 9 months old (Of course, he was kicking way before he left the womb). We are sorry, Feet, that we missed your official birthday. We will be wishing his guns a Happy 70th in 15 years. Until then, we cower under our 1950s Robsjohn Gibbings coffee table for fear of him wondering why this was not done earlier in the day.
In honor, here are a few gems from ChuckNorrisFacts.com:
Most Boots are Made for Walking. Chuck Norris’ aren’t that Merciful.
Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch. HE decides what time it is.
Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.
Outer space exists because it’s afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris
The Manhattan Project was not intended to create nuclear weapons, it was meant to recreate the destructive power in a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick. They didn’t even come close.
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